Episode 14, originally published 10-Jan-97

Visiting Hour

Hotel room with ceiling fan and overly flowery decor. Yes, definitely the Caribbean somewhere. Neil and Olivia enter laughing; Olivia carries a near-empty champagne bottle. "I can't believe it was so easy!" she exclaims. He agrees: "It WAS easy, wasn't it, Mrs. Winters? Aren't these Caribbean islands great for that? They've really branched out, you know. I remember when illicit banking was all they were good for, but now they have such a range of useful services. The combination divorce/remarriage package that came with our `Second Honey/Second Honeymoon' package here at the hotel was a great deal!" Neil says. Then he continues, "Now I can just call up my attorney and get him to work on taking Lily away from Dru." She just nods as he continues, "Can you believe the way Dru has been lately?" Little Nate runs in, interrupting. "Mommmmmy, mommmy!" he cries. "Uh, Nate. Hi... I thought you went to bed already," she says. "I diiid but I hearrd you two come back and I came to see what was going onnn. Is Neeeiil going to be my new daaaddy?" he asks with excruciating enunciation. "That's right, Nate, and soon you're going to have a sister, too." Neil promises. "Now go back to bed because your mommy and I have a little something we need to consummate." Nate looks to his mother curiously, "What's connnsummate, Mooommmmy?" he asks. "It's like celebrating, Nate... But only for adults. Run along now."

Lynn is in the office when Phyllis rushes in. "I have to see Paul and the B--Cricket," she says. "I have something important to tell them." "Well, they're not here right now, Phyllis. I think they went to Mrs. Williams' house for dinner." Phyllis looks frantic. "Is it about the wedding?" Lynn asks. "There isn't going to BE a wedding," Phyllis says. "Oh, my!" says Lynn. "Well, they won't be back tonight, so you shouldn't wait around." Phyllis fumes in circles until she achieves exit velocity, then storms out.

Back in the non-descript completely generic Caribbean island hotel room, Neil and Olivia are again alone. "I am so glad you and I see eye to eye on these things," Neil says. "Oh, I know, I just can't believe she was going away all the time like that and just leaving you." "Oh, it's not that," Neil explains, "I was upset about that but not enough to leave her. It was more the principle of the thing--I mean, when I lay down the law, that should be that. I won't have my woman questioning me. Anyway, it's good to know we're past all that. So, have you given any thought to what you'll do now that you have a little free time on your hands?" "Free time?" Olivia asks. "After you quit at the hospital. That's why you married me, isn't it? To be able to just stay at home and take car of Lily and Nate, right?"

Paul and Cricket enter the office where Lynn has recently said good-bye to Phyllis and Danny. "Oh," says Lynn, "Phyllis was just here looking for you." The two look puzzled. "I told her you wouldn't be back tonight. Aren't you having dinner with Mary?" "Yes," said Paul, "but Mom's at a church thing, so she told us to arrive late. What did Phyllis want?" "She sounded pretty frantic," Lynn says. "Maybe it had to do with the cancelled wedding." "Phyllis and Danny cancelled their wedding?! Wow..." Cricket picks up a phone and calls Phyllis's apartment looking for Danny, but Danny is not there. The phone continues to ring as Phyllis enters the front door and answers just in time. "Hello?" "Uh, Phyllis," Cricket says trying not to sound surprised. "I was looking for Danny... But maybe you can help. Lynn says you were just here and that you called off the wedding? Can that be right??" Phyllis sees an opportunity. "I was just where?" she says, feigning confusion. "At Paul's office? Cricket, I just got out of the shower. I haven't been out all day! I'm afraid your source is wrong. And of course the wedding isn't cancelled, at least not that I know of. Don't you know how much I've wanted this?"

It's the hotel lobby and Olivia is in a light trench coat with a scarf around her face so she is barely recognizable. "Pssst." she says to the manager behind the desk. He walks over to her. "Yes--uh,--ma'am is it? Are you sure you're not overdressed for this weather?" "I wonder if you have any ... uh, ... well, I saw a rat in our room and I--" "A rat? I'll have someone come up and--" "No, I wouldn't want to put anyone to any trouble; it's just--if you had some rat poison, I'd be happy to deal with the matter myself." The man gets a big smile on his face. "Rat poison? No. But I do have our "Regrets Only" special room option--it comes with two champagne glasses, one spiked with an untraceable poison. I could have it sent up with a saucer, and you could pour some champagne out for the rat to lap up." Olivia looks suddenly more at ease. As she releases the scarf, she mutters to herself, "Boy, these hotels really ARE branching out in the services they offer. Sure, have it sent up to the Winters room." "Very good ma'am. The glasses will be marked `his' and `hers'... I assume the rat will have his saucer poured from the `his' glass?" "Uh,--that's right," she says. "But don't worry about the saucer. It's a big rat. He can drink from the glass." "Goodness!" the manager says. "Oh, and do remember not to do that foolish thing where you link arms and use the wrong glass." "With a rat?" she asks with a wink. "Ah yes. Forgive me. I'll have it sent right up and billed to your new husband's account," he says with a smile. "Will you be checking out in the morning, then?" She nods. "Very good, I'll have everything arranged. Your refund check will be waiting at the desk when you pass through on the way out." "Refund check?" she asks. "For the unused flight coupon--rats are not native to this island, they usually fly in. Look around for its flight coupon, I'm sure it's nearby. And you never know when you might prefer straight cash for the purchase of champagne and other niceties on the trip home. Good night ma'am."

Nick and Sharon are driving in the car from Genoa City when they see a car whiz past at an impossibly fast speed. "Wow, says Sharon, that guy was sure in a hurry. He must have been going 400 miles per hour." Nick nods. "422 m.p.h., actually," he says proudly. Sharon looks surprised that he would know such a thing. Nick volunteers, "I computed it as a practice problem for my math class last term. You didn't see who it was?" Sharon shakes her head, "Of course not. How could I see at that speed?" "I didn't see either, but it's obvious--it was our step-father--well, my step-father. Your gynecologist." "Now I'm really confused. Why would Joshua be driving so fast?" Sharon asks. Nick continues knowingly, "Haven't you ever seen him drop by to see mom when someone cancels an appointment? Do you realize how far it is from his office to the ranch, and how short the average appointment is? If he didn't drive that fast, he and mom would have no time with each other when he got there!"

Neil has just dialed the phone, which rings in Dru's apparentment. Malcolm answers. "This is Malcolm," he says into the phone. Neil pauses a moment. "I want to speak to my daughter," he says. "She ain't your daughter any more, Neil." Neil shakes his head as if Malcolm could see. "No, Malcolm, Dru is not my wife, but my daughter and I--we share that special bond that will never be broken." "Yo, look here, Neil, but I've got bad news for you. That special bond, you ain't got it. She's my daughter and you can just forget about her... permanently I mean, not like you usually do for weeks at a time." "Hey, you're not making sense, brother. She's my daughter and--" "No, Neil, she ain't. I slept with Dru and she's my daughter." "Now listen up, Malcolm, 'cuz this is may be something they don't explain to you on the streets where you were hangin' before you got that high-powered studio and all, ya know, but you don't get to sleep with the mother after-the-fact and have her daughter become yours." "No, you listen, Holmes. You ain't hearin' me. I slept with your wife before--while you was married. It was just a little misunderstanding. Anyway, Lily is my daughter and you can just forget about her. I'm tellin' you man, your special bond with her turned out to be a junk bond, so just chill, will ya." Neil freezes, confused, then finally says, "Uh, look, I gotta go. My new wife has ordered up champagne. But this is not over, ya hear? You tell my former wife, ok? I'm'onna be coming for li'l Lily. You tell her."

Cricket and Paul are in Paul's office. "Paul, I'm worried. Why would Lynn say the wedding was cancelled if it weren't? Did she just make it up??" Paul shakes his head, "I don't know. Maybe Phyllis was lying." "Well, maybe," says Cricket, "but I called Danny and he didn't know anything about it either. I can imagine Phyllis lying, but not about this. And Danny would tell us if it were canceled. Sooo, since he didn't, it makes me think Lynn is being REALLY WEIRD." Paul is quiet for a moment, then says, "You don't think this could be connected to our trip downtown, do you?" "To the police?" Cricket asks. "Yeah, maybe she's trying to distract us from thinking about that." "You could be right, Paul, Lynn had every motive to want me injured! I wonder if she's the mystery attacker we almost closed the book on." Paul thinks some more. "Sounds more like something Phyllis would do." "Maybe," says Cricket, "but Phyllis had no motive to run us down--having us together was the best thing for her in her attempt to get back with Danny. I don't think it could have been her. Lynn, though... don't you notice the way she has posters of you in the women's rest room stalls?" "I never go in there," Paul responds. Cricket says, "Oh, right. Well, she does... and I'm starting to wonder if maybe it's not just some mild crush, maybe she's..." Paul looks at Cricket with a sudden look of fear. "You might be right, Cricket, but we have to treat this delicately. Let's just be on our guard and look for other clues. It's time for Mom's dinner."

Nate is holding the phone. "Helllloooo? ... Aunt Druuuu? ... This is Nate! I'm callllling to tell you that we're coming hooome soon. I HAD a new daddy, too, but now I don't. Mommmy and my new daaaddy were connsummating but I wasn't because I'm not a adult and so I had to just watch. But then suddenly my new daddy got really still and Mommy said he was just waiting to go visit my real daddy in Heaven. I asked if I could go too because I THOOOUGHT you couldn't visit, but she wouldn't lettt me. Then there were poliiice and doooccctors EVERYWHERE. And now mommmmy and I are going to go up in the skyyyyy too but we WON'T be going to heaven. We won't even be able to SEE it. We'll just be returning to Gennnoa city... Bye Aunt Dru."

It's the end of another filling meal for Paul and the Bug at Mary's house. The Bug gets up and helps Mary take the dishes to the kitchen. "You know, Mary," she says as they enter the kitchen, "you really do well for a woman with no income. You have money to shop, and to live comfortably. And you raised all those kids--it must have been so hard to save money as you did. I just have to ask: How do you do it? Were you just really careful with your investing?" Mary replies, "Why, Christine, I never did any investing. And what gives you the idea I don't have any income?" "You mean you do?" "Yes, two of them. Come, I'll show you." She leads the perplexed Christine down some stairs to the basement, where we see a large glass window looking in at a room where Carl Williams works at a desk. "Can he see us?" Cricket asks. "No, that frustrates him too much. So I had this barrier put in--it's one-way glass... and soundproof," she says proudly. "And he's just trapped in there? Mary!" she half-whines/half-scolds. "Oh, he's used to it by now," Mary says matter-of-factly. "I keep him well fed, and he just works away for me." "Works? All alone like that? Does he have an internet connection?" "Oh, I couldn't have that. He might learn how to make a bomb or something and then he'd be free. No, he's all cut off from the outside world in there." "But then how can he work?" Mary gives a good laugh. "I should make you guess, but you probably never would--it took me forever to figure out that out. He's got the perfect job, where he can stay locked away ignoring current events, fashion, changing societal attitudes and speech patterns." "What is he? A historian?" "Not exactly, Christine, but you're very close! He writes soap opera scripts..."

That's all for this episode. Hope you learned something. Don't miss Episode 15!
If you missed any older episodes, see the index.

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