Episode 129, originally published 03-Jul-99

AWO Break

A Collection of Limericks

The Great Man survives a crashed flight,
His ability to walk is quite slight.
Yet no matter how kicked
He just can't be licked.
To stop him, one needs kryptonite.

A mystery board meeting's comes,
"Who called it?" they wonder--how dumb!
They are serious dopes,
Or only on soaps
Are there e-mails that come without 'froms'.

A billionaire and his plane
Went astray on the wide open plain
Laid up with a moaner,
He loved Arizoner
Now he's home and it's time to explain.

Seeing Newman, the biz, was stuck in a mess,
Said Ash to the board, "Be magnanimous--
To my dad give Jabot,
And to Vic the rest goes."
At last the vote was unanimous.

Over sweet little innocent Cassie,
was a custody case oh so crass--see?
But the case ended early
As she reached the Gates Pearly
Being torn limb from limb by those lassies.

So sullen was Mary she'd weep
Of grandchildren there'd been no peep.
Taking lessons from Jill
She went off the pill.
Soon in grandkids was Mary knee-deep.

"Dad," asked young Nick, "when I'm randy,
is it best if I ply femmes with brandy?"
"M'boy," said his father,
"Pouring drinks is a bother.
Slick your hair with KY, so it's handy."

A secretary named Lynne
When her Friday date canceled did grin.
"I'll go out with Marissa,
Who I hear's a good kissa..."
Now the two live quite happily in sin.

As Ryan's job options had petered,
Said a pro, who billed with a meter,
One last piece of advice,
At no extra price:
Just comb it, don't use an eggbeater.

That's all for this episode. Hope you learned something. Don't miss Episode 130!
If you missed any older episodes, see the index.

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